It's a fuck up waiting to happen.
I'm a fuck up!
I've brought new blades. Not just new blades,
but stanley knife, proper blades.
I don't want this pain, it all hurts so much,
I'm insisting that I carry on for now..
Keep trying.
But then another part of me just thinks
"what's the point?"
Nothing is going to change.
I believed them 7 years ago when they said it would change -
that things would get better.
I believed them 4 years ago again - with the promise of change.
It hasn't.
It wont.
And it never will.
I dont have the belief in me to believe or trust for any different.
Pain is all I shall ever know..
I can't hurt like this forever.
I'm not as strong as people think I am.
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