ρℓєαѕє ¢σмє ιη; ι нανє вєєη єχρє¢тιηg уσυ ♥

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I am just a randomer; another mentalist at large
A 19 year old female, who doesn't know who she is or what
she's doing, searching the madosphere one blog at a time (:

Hoping to find, who and what she's looking for and every
reason as to why to
look in the first place.
Welcome everyone!
mentalists and bloggers alike.
Join me as I find my place in this world, doubting
the who's, what's, why's and wheres of my life.
Trying to make a compromise between what I want and
need, what I already have and what I can leave behind.

ρєσρℓє ωнσ яєα∂ му яαмвℓєѕ♥

ƒσℓℓσω тнє яαιηвσω

Saturday, 16 April 2011

Even lower..

I can feel myself slipping again.
Lower even..
Not wanting to get out of bed.
And even when I do nothing feels real..
Dream-like state.. 

I've spent more time looking at my walls and the duvet cover then actually reading this book.
I cant focus or concentrate which is making things harder..
I'm feeling tempted to follow through with my plans whilst I still have to energy to do them - but then when I actually consider how I am, I can't decide if the moment has passed already.
I'm hurting so much, I wish someone could just wrap me in a hug and make me feel safe again. :(

Flashbacks. Nightmares. Intrusive thoughts.. 
The world is too bright and too loud in different ways.. hiding away from the world just doesn't seem to be working though. 

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♥ ωє ℓσνє уσυ ♥

Notes from Friends - Lest I Forget ♥
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

♥ Please be my dude forever?
I know your trying and we're
all proud of your efforts. Don't
be disheartened
by little slips.
You wouldn't be our
bestest
dude if you weren't you;
we
love you; quirks and all (:

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
I cannot ease your aching
heart, Nor take your pain away,
But let me stay and take your
hand, And walk with you today
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Word's can't express what it
means to have you in my life.
I Love You
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
I hope you have a good day -
you deserve it. You are so much

stronger then even YOU realise.
I will love you forever
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥